Damn My Dog Bit me last night!

Well last night my black lab bit me. I had to go to the hospital and had a stitch put in, cleaned out, and get antibiotic to take for 8 days. 
Strange thing. I am in shock that he did that.
He bit me a couple weeks ago a couple days after Byron Passed away.
I forgave him, it was not a bad bite and thought it was because he was mourning Byron's death.  Last time, I had dropped a piece of pizza crust on the floor and I was reaching down to pick it up to give it to him and he bit me, growling and mad, I thought cuz he figured he wasn't going to get the pizza crust. who knows?

Tonight I had gave him a leaf of spinach to see if he would want it.. he dropped it down on the floor. The cat started going over to it, so I grabbed the cat and put her in a different room. Then walked back and said, Pal, are you going to eat that? I noticed it looked like it was sort of under the rug, so I was taking my foot to move the rug corner and slide the spinach over toward me more.Then I pointed down and said, here honey, do you eat spinach do you want this.. when I pointed down he bit me and bit me again.. it was like, What the Heck?
My son was there and he looked up and I said, damn I can't believe he bit me.

(Now, I had fear that is why I used my foot to move the spinach instead of bending over to pick it up.... so did it happen because I had fear?)

I grabbed pal's color and said BAD BOY, NO and he growled at me.
I told him to go in the bedroom.  Then I lifted my sweat shirt sleeve up and saw he got me pretty good. My son said, let's go we are going to the hospital.. of course I  ran to the bathroom to wash it out and refused due to me not having medical insurance. But, then he was talking to my brother, and my brother said get to the hospital and I called my girl friend Betty and she said Get up there. So I was out numbered. LOL. 
I called the hospital and asked them if they charged on a sliding scale due to income. They said yes.. but who knows how much this will cost.

Pal  Bit Byron lightly about a month prior to his passing I think that was over a toy, Byron was going to pick up and throw for him.
What has gotten into Pal is beyond me. But now with Byron, not here, I would be scared to be alone with Pal... as I actually thought he was going to attack me more when I was grabbing his color and sending him into the bedroom. Growling and showing his teeth. Wow, all over one leaf of spinach.  He will be 11 years old on July 2nd, 2014. 
I have a feeling I will have to bring him to the vet and put him to sleep and since it is Winter time here, I would have to get him cremated. More expenses!  I just would not feel safe to have Pal around my grand kids, what if he bit them?  It is one thing to be me, but my grand kids is another story!It just saddens me. Our 2 dogs and 3 cats, are like Byron and I's Kids, as we didn't have kids together so we just loved our animals and spoiled them like our kids. With loosing Byron , March 3rd and now having to put Pal to sleep is a bit overwhelming to think about right now.
Is the planet alignment happening this month affecting people and animals..? So many deaths just the last few weeks, it is unbelievable!
Pal was originally my Son's so it is hurting him also.. to see him put to sleep, but he does not want me to be left here and worry about him doing it again.
That is 3 times in 2 months.
Below is the pictures of the 3 spots I got bit. I got a stitch put in, I  will have to have my son take a picture of it now. Have to go to kmart for antibiotics tomorrow, they gave me one tonight. They said to eat yogurt to prevent yeast infection from the antibiotics.. Really?  All my life I had to always get a darn prescription of Monostat which cost more money and now they tell me the secret?  Interesting!
I will have to write a blog post about Pal, as it was a very interesting one, when he was a puppy. 
So confused don't know what to do......................

3 places he got me good!

Reflections and Turning my Thoughts Around

I have had a lot of miracles happen this week, that I am truly blessed.
Beautiful Friends, Family, love and support from ALL.. it is amazing and I am So Grateful
Monday,  the day Byron left his physical body , was hard for me to stay in my heart place. In a State of shock.  I had to keep refocusing my mind from
Myself  and my feelings and live in appreciation of the Beautiful Times I had with him. The Fantastic Memories that we shared together. All that we have learned and loving all the deep conversations we had together, the last few years,. They were totally amazing, and were leading us to what we are here living in our physical existence for. We put in a lot of work into turning our thoughts around and old beliefs that were not serving us anymore.
Removing Fear, Pain, and emotions that were not truth.
The last few months we felt we were really starting to understand this new way of life that our souls was telling us to live.
We are here to love each other, love our lives and Live our lives with love.
See the mirrors that our minds are showing us.

I am allowing my heart to guide me to what to do every day.

I have allowed other peoples mirrors (their thoughts and spoken words),to affect my emotions, forgetting while in the grief state, that what others say is their truth, their beliefs, and their mirrors of things they need to review and change on their own time.

I am going to reflect on my thoughts and release them as they are not mine to hold. The thoughts that I allowed to become mine from others.

I AM :
Staying Focused on Positive Thoughts
Watch My Thoughts and Watch what I speak.  as they are writing My Script of My Future.
Believe in Myself
Believe in Others
Believe and have faith in what I have wrote for my future with my thoughts.
Listen to my Inner Self.
Live each day to the fullest and do things with love.
Live Love, Be Love, Feel Love, and Love Living.

I am Grateful for my Life
I am Grateful for ALL Things
I have so much to be Grateful for.
Life is Good.

I will be sharing beautiful experience in my Other blog of Our Spirits Talk.
I am so blessed.

Release all emotions of Fear, worry , pain,  as they are not high vibration energy.
It is my Responsibility to  myself, and to ALL,  to stay  in high energy as that is the only way to change anything.

I lived another Day and found Miracles to be grateful for.
Life is Good.

Random notes of thoughts today

My son and I were talking today and we were discussing Byron quitting smoking with the patch .. he used the patch for a year. He broke out all down the lower part of both legs so,  he stopped using the patch. I am seriously wondering if that is what started having a problem with his heart. Those patches are not meant  to use for a year.  When I reflect back Last summer he said his left arm felt numb and so I had finished mowing the grass, and I did all the mowing when he was gone to work. so that problem never came back up for him.. maybe because I was doing the mowing or it might have again? 
Then I remember when he was working at k-mart he had to push the heavy carts into the store in the middle of the winter and he said he was really out of breath then. He told his boss and so he did not have to do that anymore.
Then when we had all that cold weather and then it had snowed, he said he was out of breath one time when he was blowing snow. So I went out and helped him.
I asked him if he needed to see the doctor, but he thought maybe it was just anxiety over all that snow or maybe having problems breathing due to the cold weather or thought maybe he had not quite gotten over the bad cold he and I had in January.
He also was worried it maybe just trouble breathing due to smoking and his lungs were clearing out now after not smoking since End of March or First Part of April , 2012.  Damn I wish I would have made an appointment for him, he might still be alive!
I know I should not go there, with the would have, should have or could haves as that will not bring him back.
But I was thinking that this all started after those patches!
But then the numbness in his arm didn't come back that I can remember, but it seems like I am remembering more as I keep thinking about it.. why we did not see the signs??
 .. I only remember him saying it those couple times and the  trouble breathing a couple weeks prior to this happening, but he said he thought he was doing better. He was drinking honey, lemon and cinnamon drinks in the morning and at night. He said,  he seemed to feel better.

So, I did not push for him to see the doctor. I really wish I would have.

I know when he was wearing the patch for such a long time, I was really concerned then and told him he should see a doctor about the rash on his leg and get a checkup, but he didn't have medical insurance and the VA doctor was an hour away. Oh yes, I do remember him trying to get an appointment once and  the soonest he could get in was in the middle of the winter and he said, he would wait until spring then because he didn't like driving very far in the winter time. Since none of the symptoms continued he thought he was okay and it was nothing serious.  
Boy, both of us were wrong on that!

Oh, when I was just talking to one of Byron's Brothers, I did remember one other time, he woke up in the middle of the night and said he was short of breath, he drank water, took an aspirin and he said a prayer and circled healing light around himself and he felt better and he thought he was going to be okay. Thought maybe it was bad indigestion. I completely forgot about that until tonight.  So damn, it was like he had small little signs, but we didn't take any of them seriously.

I really have to write more about this .. as the next mornming, he told me all about it.. and we even recorded  the experience that he had. As I turned on the digital recorder a lot of mornings when we had our morning talks. We loved deep conversations. So, I do remember taping this conversation about this experience. I really will need to go through all of our recordings and get them uploaded into a video format.  That way I have everything documented to reflect back on.  We had so many great conversations about what life is all about... what we think our life purpose is etc. I loved those mornings! I miss them terribly.  To find a man who had the same beliefs as I do.. was so amazing!
=============
I keep  turning to talk to him, and he is not here.  I even find myself still talking to him anyway, as I feel he is with me in spirit and he can hear me talking to him.
I know  our love was strong and we are always connected.

=============
Today , I talked to the mortician and he said,  Byron had already been cremated and he had the ashes there for me to pick up on Monday.
He told me about the one urn that was hand made by someone in MN and that Byron Loved to work with Wood. He loved it.. he made a lot of our things in our home with wood and did an Excellent Job! Anyway, I would love to get that Urn for him it is $125 Dollars, this would be so fitting for Byron, it would be made out of what he loved to do. He had made lots of jewelry boxes and storage benches,  made huge beautiful dressers, bed stands, and a storage cabinet out of wood and they are so beautiful, so it s only fitting that he has this Urn to show his personality and love .
Here is a picture of it: 

It is Beautiful.. you can get some with designs like a deer, etc.. not sure if that is more or not. But I think Byron would really love this.

I tried to call Social Scrutiny today to see about getting on Disputably (as I am legally blind) and widows pension. I guess it is called survivors benefits. Could not get through, so going to try tomorrow. Have to call VA and get his service information also for his obituary and I guess to get Funeral benefit of I think $250, a flag, name tag and a free death certificate in his honor.
Also need to call the pastor tomorrow about the memorial. Some people are saying to wait until spring. The only thing about this, is that I will have this on my mind at all times until then and all the family and friends will not really have closure until we have the memorial. So, I am not sure, if  I should have it in a week or the weekend of his birthday, or wait until May?
Then what do I do ??? Put the obituary in the paper now and then put something in the paper again when the memorial happens?
I would not want people driving on the roads in bad weather! So, I am very confused about this!

All I know is that I really need to start selling things, such as the car and pickup. Even though if I move, the pickup would come in handy for my son to drive and help me . So many decisions.. But I want to make them all with my heart not my mind.  The mind can tell you things that are not true. Worrying about things that I should not worry about..  Just allow and let things play out.. have faith that all will turn out wonderfully. 

Believe , have hope and faith and allow

Blog Post About what Happened March 3rd with Byron (Herb)

We went to bed around 3:30 AM, life was good. He did not mention anything about not feeling good.  We laughed and talked after he got home from work and made plans for his day off (Monday, march 3rd).
I had gotten up to go to the bathroom and then he woke up to go to the bathroom.
He walked into the kitchen for some water, said his mouth was dry and he was having problems breathing. I asked him what was going on?  Then it was harder for him to breath and said, I cannot get my breath .. call 911. My husband does not say this to me, so I knew he was serious. 
I called 911 and since he was just in his underwear and t-shirt I tried to get his sweat pants on for him.  then I ran in the bedroom to get dressed.
I instantly got a nervous stomach and had to run to the bathroom. I  kept asking Byron, are you okay? the ambulance is coming right away.
The police were at the front door ringing the door bell before I got off the toilet.
I hurried and ran to the door and they checked what was the best way for the ambulance to bring in a stretcher as there are sharp corners on both ends of the house. The ambulance came, they gave him oxygen and started putting wires on him. I told them I needed a ride to go with him as I could not drive and follow behind as I was blind.   I  thought I could ride in the ambulance with him.
They had to bring in a wheel chair put him in that to bring him outside to put  him in the stretcher.  I kept telling him , it will be okay honey. I love you .. 
I ran in the house to get the keys to the house and to find his wallet, which took me a few minutes.... put on my boots, looked out the window and they had him in the ambulance  Once I got my coat and everything on and made sure the key worked to open the door again. The ambulance started moving , I ran out there to catch them .. running after them.. but they did not see me or stop. 
The  neighbor was letting her dog in and I asked if she could bring me to the hospital. She had to get dressed first so I ran back home and had to go to the bathroom again..  it must have been bad nerves. The door bell rang and it was a chaplain from the fire department who said he would give me a ride if I needed one.. I said the neighbor was giving me a ride and should be waiting for me but please to go to the alley , just in case. He did and she was there, so she brought me there. When I got to the hospital, they took me to the room and said, the doctor needed to talk to me. I said what is wrong.. by the looks of their faces, I knew it was not good news.  The doctor came in and told me they were trying to revive him and for me to go in and say my goodbyes. I said, you Revive him 
and don't give up on my husband. He left and I followed and went in the room where they were working on him. They worked on him for an hour, I sang him "You are my sunshine,"  told him I loved him, I was there, don't give up babe.. all is good, you keep fighting, come back baby... I am hear.. we will lick this hon.. and sang You are my sunshine to him again.  They were going to give up a couple times and I said, NO keep doing it, don't give up.  After an hour , his heart started beating again.  They were surprised. they checked his pulse and  and starting checking him.. I talked to Byron some more.. good job hon.. I knew you could pull through it.. I love you .. 
They called helicopter and called Duluth hospital to give his stats etc..
oh yes, and during this time a chaplin came in to pray over Byron and put his hand on my shoulder while I was holding Byron's hand. I would say: Pray for him that he pulls through. 
The helicopter guys came in , and started getting him ready to go. I gave them  my phone numbers and told them I would have to arrange a ride to go to Duluth.
They asked, if it happens again in the air, what I wanted them to do.. I said, bring him back and get him there safe.  They had precious cargo.
I watched the helicopter fly away and got a ride home with my neighbor. Called some friends to see if they could watch my pets and give me a ride.
Called my sister and asked her to call around for prayers.
I noticed an hour had passed so I called the Duluth hospital, they said he was there , but a doctor had to talk to me. A chaplin came on the phone until the doctor came to talk to me. The Doctor said, that his heart had stopped again and they were working on him and when his heart starts beating again, they would bring him down to a different unit and  put a stent in where he had blockage.
I thanked him and told him, I was trying to get there as soon as i  could, but to please keep me posted. My friend was telling me who to call, that I could probably get a ride.. from the county ........  I was about to get in the car and drive myself.  the phone rang and it was the hospital telling me he had passed away that there would be no need for me to come to the hospital. Well, what he said was , is there anyone that would want to see him soon before they brought him to the morgue. something in that effect.. after he said, he had passed away, it become a fog.  he asked me what funeral home I would use ....... etc.. I said, I have no idea,, I guess the local one as there is only one in town, but  I would have to call him back.  I made phone calls and talked to my friend, Betty who recommended the funeral home in Black Duck as they were very nice and good to people. She called them to find out some details and called me back with the number etc.., the mortician was gone on a call and were were waiting for him to call us back to arrange him to pick Byron's body up.  Betty came over and stayed with me for quite a long time. For that I am thankful.  I spoke to him and he said he would go the next morning to get Byron and would bring him to me, since I could not drive down to see him. I was grateful. I posted about my loss on Facebook and a friend: Mary Helen Ferris called me from Canada, we talked for quite some time and she read me a beautiful poem, she has such a soothing voice, which calmed me down and then we said, good night and I went to bed.

Another Dear friend: Jane Porterfield had set up a fundraiser as soon as she heard the news to help with cremation and medical expenses.
http://www.gofundme.com/7a3vzo

I am truly blessed to have such a loving, caring response to me and my situation, when I had not met these people in person, but they wanted to help. I was so grateful .. and the amount of people of my friends on Facebook that gave prayers, thoughts, sympathy, hugs, sending love and light was just totally enormous.

Tuesday, Betty came over and brought food and kept me company until the mortician came  and right them, my daughter and son in law drove up too.
Curt, the mortician, wanted to back up to the garage so that I could see Byron in privacy.  The garage door was jammed, so my son in law had to fix it  quickly.
We talked about what would happen, and the cost, I signed the papers and then he got Byron ready for me to see him.  I was actually hoping it was just a bad dream and when I went out there, it would be someone else.  Well unfortunately it was my husband. I spend a good 45 minutes or so with him.  I am so grateful for this time to have to spend with him. The phone call telling me about his death was just not real.. but seeing my husband's body, I knew I had to deal with his death.
I asked for a clip of his curly hair  in the back that I loved so much. He accommodated.  I used to cut Byron's hair all the time and Byron would smile and brag when someone noticed his hair and said, Good Hair cut.. Then Byron would say: Thank You , pretty good job for a wife that is blind. Smile and laugh.

My daughter stayed with me until around 1:30 AM and  then I spoke to my son until 3:30 AM.  Went to bed.

Wednesday, March 5th
My daughter had brought care package from home on Tuesday with her and found out more things I needed and bought them for me on Wednesday.
She also told me that her two kids, my beautiful grand kids, were going to be baptized at the same church I was  56 years ago. That since I could not drive, they thought they would have a private baptism while they were in town.
They were baptized at 6 PM in the fireside room with the baptismal  stand that I was baptized over. Wow, how special is that. They had a new one in the church area, but they wanted to use this one.  I cried with Joy for the miracle and the blessings that are coming to me even during this time.

I played with the Grand Kids and watched a small movie until we got tired... but then  I came online and read facebook etc.. talked to a few friends.. and my son.. and now writing this blog post before I went to bed.
I want to document things while I remember.

The enormous love and support from all of these beautiful souls that I call my friends online has been so heartfelt. I am so grateful for their love, prayers, kind words of encouragement and support.
I love You all
I love and Miss you, Byron, who is known as Herb Westcott online. 

Closing this post for now, but going to keep posting, my dreams and my thoughts  etc... 

just for reference for later listening and refelcting

My Husband passed away March 3, 2014 at 12: 32 PM
So I am checking to see what David said about these days
This post is a personal post with the horoscopes of the days  I missed.
There is a lot of information in them.. too much to take in.. so posting to listen to again. 
I will be do a blog post about my husband and what happened also.






That was a lot to take in.. so posting this .......... to listen to later


March 7, 2014 Adding another one to reflect on

Akashic Record Reading That I had : Introduction

For about 14 years now, I have had experiences that most people might think  they were strange.  Which were exciting when they happened even though
I questioned things in my mind if they were really happening sometimes.
They were experiences that some people would say were paranormal, after a while, they became Normal to me, as I accepted what was happening.

The reason I wanted to have an Akashic Record Reading done though, was based on what has been happening the last 3 1/2 years. Since  August, 2011.
If you watched my Video regarding my birthday present from my husband in August 2011, this would explain to you a little of what has been happening . (For more details on those experiences watch the video below Called How a Birthday Present Changed My Life. )
I had so many questions and wanted confirmation as to what I thought was going on or find out the truth.  I also wanted to have my life purpose explained more, as I have had channeled information and I wanted this confirmed and explained more in detail. 
The last section (which will be Video 5) was very interesting as I asked about why I had a fear to go to California. I have worked on this issue many times and had never figured out why I had such a deep seeded fear. They answered it completely and I feel that I can now move forward and go to California. So stay tuned for the uploads and blog posts in regards to this. 
I will be sharing most of what was said during my reading in videos.
I have divided the reading into 5 parts.
I will be writing blog posts about what I felt about each section as I upload the videos.  So Stay Tuned! 

If you do not know what an Akashic Record Reading is please listen to Holly's Video here:  at:  http://www.akashahealingstudio.com/readings/
Here is their Facebook page:
https://www.facebook.com/pages/Akasha-Healing-Studio/200477016657176

Holly Just came out with a New Video explaining she will now begin a series of videos explaining about the Akashic Record Readings, so you can ask her questions and find out a whole lot more about them! 
Please take a few minutes to watch this: Akashic Minutes Introduction

http://youtu.be/DITSzO4c_t8 

Here is the Video regarding what has been happening since August 2011

with a Brief description: 


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Bright Blessings
Dee